The First Night

This is all new to me, this relationship with Darren, so we're taking it slow and for that I am thankful.

But tonight, as I lie here in his arms, I find myself wishing that we could take that final step together.

It's scary enough, this being my first male/male relationship and the fact that I'd never looked at a man before Darren, knowing that he'd looked at many, but the fact that I am actually considering sex with this man...well...let's just say it takes a bit to get used to.

"Danny, what are you thinking?" Darren asks, his warm breath ghosting over my ear and the back of my neck, causing me to shiver slightly.

I turn in his arms and feel my heart speed up in pleasure as I face him, his eyes shining with love and affection.

I see this every time I look at him but it still excites me, knowing that I'm with someone who truly loves me for all that I am.

"Nothing much, just you." I answer him finally and his face breaks into a huge grin.

"Well, that's okay then." He tells me before leaning forward and pressing his lips against mine.

Almost instantly I open my mouth to his probing tongue and I sigh with pleasure as his arms move to pull me tighter against him.

I return the kiss as I slide my fingers over his pale cheeks and into his dirty blond hair, trying to draw his face closer to me.

Never in my wildest dreams did I ever think I could crave something as much as I crave this man's kisses...

He moans into my mouth and I know he's trying to restrain himself from going any further, but tonight I don't want him to do it.

Kissing him harder, I take his hand and pull it down my body until it rests against my crotch and I sigh softly.

He goes to move his hand away but I hold it there, moving my hips slightly.

"Danny...?" he begins, breaking our heated kiss, "Are you sure?"

I smile at him, hoping he can see the love in my eyes, and I nod my head.

"At the risk of sounding horribly clichéd and causing you to run from the room, screaming...I want you...I want to know what it feels like to truly be with you..." I whisper before my lips seek his once more, my tongue moving to taste him.

Our kiss grows more passionate as our hands seek each other's skin and I can't help but moan as Darren begins to rub me through my jeans.

Then, almost as quickly as he'd started, he stops and pulls away from me.

"Dar..." I begin but he silences me with a finger on my lips.

"Shh...I want to make this special. Shut your eyes and don't open them until I tell you, no matter what you hear or anything." He tells me and then he kisses me softly.

He waits until I've shut my eyes then I feel him move away from me and I barely stop myself from reaching out to him.

I remain sitting on the couch, listening to the television drone on about the low Australian dollar and it seems like hours before I feel Darren beside me once more.

"Can I open them?" I ask, reaching out to pull him close.

"No, but you can follow me." He answers before taking my hands and pulling me to my feet.

He then leads me in the direction of what I can only guess to be his music room.

It's not much of a room but he has the most beautiful fireplace in there and I love to go in there in winter and sit in front of the fire and write music with himand he knows it.

As we enter the room, I instantly feel the warmth and know that he's lit the fireplace.

He knows me well.

He continues to lead me forward until my bare feet step onto something that feels like velvet.

My mind instantly flashes back to the night when we first kissed.

I'd been caught in a rainstorm and, by the time I'd reached Darren's house, I was totally drenched and shivering violently.

The minute he saw me, he pulled me into his music room and sat me in front of the fire while he hurried off to get some towels, some spare clothes and a blanket.

He turned his back as I peeled off my drenched clothes and rubbed myself over with the towels.

He kept his back turned as I pulled on his own clothes, inhaling his scent deeply, and only then did he turn around.

He quickly wrapped me in the blanket then hurried off to stick my clothes in the laundry and by the time he'd gotten back, I'd only just stopped shivering.

He knelt in front of me and immediately began to rub my arms through the blanket, restoring warmth to them.

I watched him and when his eyes finally met mine, his hands stilled and we just stared at each other, almost as though we were seeing each other for the first time.

I don't know who moved first but before I knew it, our lips were touching and we were kissing each other with a built up passion.

I smile at the memory, then I move to stand fully on the velvet blanket, digging my toes into the delicious texture.

I feel Darren moving around in front of me then I feel him tug on my hands, forcing me to lower myself to my knees.

"Okay, you can open your eyes now." He says and I do so immediately.

The site that greets me looks almost as though it's straight out of a romance novel.

The lights are off but they're not needed as there are candles burning from every single flat surface, casting a flickering glow over the room.

I continue to look around, my eyes next focusing on the blazing fire of the fireplace, filling me with its warmth.

Looking down, I find myself kneeling on the velvet blanket from my memories and resting at the head of it, a few pillows.

Finally my eyes meet Darren's and he looks at me expectantly.

I think he's wondering if I'm going to back out.

I reassure him the only way I know how, by reaching out and pulling him close, pressing my lips against his, my tongue quickly gaining entrance.

The kiss is long and lazy, none of us in a hurry to finish anything, just enjoying being with each other and revelling in the fact that we're about to take the final and most important step in our relationship.

His hands run down my body and I sigh against his lips as they find their way up and under my shirt.

He softly caresses my chest, his fingers leaving hot trails as my own hands move to rid him of his shirt.

The shirt removed, I break the kiss and lean back, taking in the image of him kneeling before me, his chest bare and heaving with each breath he took.

He says my name softly and I reach for him, my fingers trailing through his chest hairs, sending a shiver down his spine.

Seconds later his lips are on mine once more and I feel him pushing me backwards, laying me down, my head resting on the pillows that he'd placed there.

I shift slightly under him then I resume my investigation of his chest, enjoying the unfamiliar feel of it and the sounds of pleasure my exploring is bringing from Darren.

It's not long before my fingers find his nipples and I jump as he lets out a loud moan and pushes himself harder against me.

"Gee...you weren't kidding..." I mumble against his lips and he chuckles.

"You read too much..." he replies and that is the end of that conversation as he swiftly removes my shirt and begins to kiss his way down my chest.

I've had women do this to me, but with Darren it feels different, almost more intoxicating if possible.

//So this is what it feels like to be with someone you truly love?//

He reaches my belly button and I begin to squirm and giggle as he tickles me with his tongue.

I know he's trying to relax me and for that, I'm totally grateful.

He looks up at me, his blue eyes sparkling in the light of the candles, and I almost feel like I'm melting.

"C'mere." I whisper huskily and I pull him up my body to kiss him passionately, my arms holding him tightly against me.

As he returns the kiss, I feel his hands slide down my body until they're resting on my slim hips and I feel him falter once more, as though he's still not sure that I really want this.

I moan in frustration then I move press my hardness against him, almost begging him to touch me.

"Please..." I beg softly and then his hand is on me once more, rubbing me, sending pleasure throughout my entire body.

I moan his name as my hand seeks his own hardness, wanting to give him the same sensation he's giving me.

We continue kissing and caressing for a little longer then I feel his hands go to my fly and I close my eyes tightly as he slowly pulls it down, releasing my aching erection bit by bit.

Then I feel the heat of his hand on me and I cry out, arching my hips up, wanting more.

Caressing me once more, he pulls back from me and I find myself whimpering at the loss of his heat.

"I want you to know that if you tell me to stop at any time, I will. I don't want you to continue with this because you think I'll get upset if you change your mind." He explains and I watch as his hands move to his own pants.

"I want this, Darren." I mutter as my own hands move to help Darren in his task and removing his pants completely, my breath catching in my throat as he reveals his hardness to me.

I almost lose my nerve right there and then but when I feel Darren's hands on me once more, all thought...and the ability to speak for that matter...escapes me and all I can do is moan and raise my hips.

"Danny, I want you to touch me." Darren whispers and my eyes open wide.

//Can I do that?//

Biting my bottom lip, I slowly reach out and gently run my fingers over his hardness.

Encouraged by his deep moan of appreciation, I wrap my hand around him and begin to move up and down, reminiscent of many a lonely night by myself.

Seconds later his body is once more over mine and his mouth is plundering mine as his hand mirrors my movements, making me moan deeply.

We begin to move our bodies against each other and our moans and sighs of pleasure are the only sounds that can be heard.

As the passion builds, Darren's lips slide down my throat and his teeth nip at the skin, leaving small marks that were sure to show in the morning, and I feel my release shooting through my body.

"Darren...uhhhh...now...NOW!!!..." I cry loudly and then my world explodes.

I scream his name and am only vaguely aware that he's doing the same as wave after wave of pleasure shoots through me.

I'm finally brought back down to earth by Darren's tongue, licking at the bite mark he'd left after his climax had made him lose every ounce of control he had.

"That was amazing!" I whisper huskily and he looks at me, his blue eyes slightly unfocused with passion.

Darren mumbles something in reply then his head dips to nuzzle my chest before slowly moving lower and licking at the white substance that covers my skin.

When he finally looks at me once more, his eyes are clearer and he has a serious expression on his face.

"What is it?" I ask worriedly, running my shaking fingers through his hair.

"I just want to make sure you're sure." He says and I pull him up to kiss him deeply.

"Darren, I want this. Believe me, I want nothing else." I tell him then sigh softly as the kiss deepens.

Within seconds, my pants are finally removed and I revel in the feel of Darren's entire length against mine, skin to skin.

"You feel so good." I sigh then shiver as I feel his hands move to the inside of my thighs, caressing the sensitive skin, urging me to part my legs further.

I do as he wishes and tense up as I feel a finger push against my opening.

"Relax..." he whispers and I mentally will myself to, concentrating on the pleasure I know he's going to bring me, not on the pain that I know will come also.

With a gasp, I feel his first finger enter me and I lie still, trying to get used to the intrusion.

"I can stop..." Darren begins but I cut him off with a heated kiss.

He returns the kiss instantly and I almost don't feel the second finger as I concentrate on his tongue.

This time, instead of pain, I feel pleasure and I begin to move my hips against his hand, my eyes shut tight as I begin to enjoy the sensation.

By the time he's pushed a third finger into me, I'm crying out his name.

"Darren...I want you inside me...now!" I plead and I'm barely able to protest at the loss of his fingers before I feel the slickened head of his hardness pushing against me.

"It's gonna hurt..."

"Just do it, dammit!" I growl then I scream as he plunges deep inside of me.

All goes quiet and neither of us moves as I struggle to fight through the pain shooting through my body.

"I'm so sorry, Danny..." Darren whispers, running his thumb over my cheeks and collecting the tears that have begun to stream down them.

I don't trust my voice to speak so, instead, I just pull his head close and kiss him deeply.

As we kiss, I move my hips slightly and am almost shocked at the sensation of it.

Darren catches on quickly and begins to move in time with me, slowly moving inside of me until I find myself pleading for more.

I vocalise the intensity of what I'm feeling in the only way I can, I repeat his name over and over again, telling him how good it feels.

His response is to move harder and deeper inside of me until I'm digging my fingernails painfully into his thrusting hips, my legs wrapped tightly around him.

I want more of him, I want all of him.

I can feel his control slowly slipping away from him and I urge him to let go and give in to me.

His teeth once more anchor themselves to my throat as he begins to slam into me until at last he screams my name in release, his white heat shooting deep inside of me as my own covers both his and my stomachs.

He continues to ride me as our bloods cool then his body collapses on top of mine and his hard breathing is in my ear.

"Thank you..." I whisper huskily and I don't have to explain what I mean as he kisses me deeply.

Finally breaking the kiss, Darren grabs the edge of the blanket and pulls it over to cover us and I snuggle up to him, my head resting on his chest as his arms wrap themselves tightly around me.

"I love you..." is the last thing he says before we both fall asleep, basking in the warm glow of the dying fire and the heat of each other.