My world is about to change. This is the end of the line, the end of Savage Garden....The end of
us. This is our last show together, after tonight, it's all over. Can you blame me for not wanting the show to end? In a few hours, we'll leave the stage and I'll watch him board a plane and fly out of my life forever. This is all that's left, two and a half hours, on-stage, in front of thousands of fans. How do I say goodbye to him without them all knowing? How can I say goodbye to him at all? I can't stop watching him, he loves it out here as much as I do. It's not fair damnit! I don't want him to go.
The show begins to slow down. It's time for the acoustic set. The rest of the band leave the stage and only he and I are left in the dark. I can feel him, sense him, smell him as he passes by me to seat himself at the piano. I choke back the tears as I look at him, watch him smile at the enthusiastic crowd. They have no idea. He's my angel, my inspiration.....It's time to say goodbye...right here, right now. He knows. I can see it in those emerald green eyes. My own eyes close as he begins to play. For a moment, I lose my voice, spellbound by his talent and tormented with the knowledge that I won't see him like this again. He's so content to be playing his music, to be on-stage before an appreciative crowd...grateful to be able to have the chance, this final moment, to say farewell. Tears well behind my closed eyes.
I'm going to miss him.
I already do.
A deep breath and I open my eyes again, training my blurry gaze on his face. //'For you Danny.'// I send the thought out, wishing he could hear me. He smiles. He knows. If I can't say goodbye the way I wanted to, I'll do the next best thing. .....
//"Wouldn't you know it,
I've lost my courage.
Isn't that funny,
Me, lost for words.
Not that it really matters,
'Cause I know you know.
And you would have told me,
Yourself if you could.
Remember the first time,
We met each other.
You were in your world,
And I was in mine.
Breaking down the barriers,
We broke all the rules.
But wasn't it good?
Wasn't it fine?
While I took for granted,
You took your time.
Longing for love,
Oh how we tried.
It's over now that's understood.
But wasn't it good?"//
He's crying. I can see tears falling from his eyes. My own tears, I've disregarded, I owe him a perfect performance, a perfect memory of how I feel and this has to be it. I don't want to let him go but I know that I have to. I have too many memories of him and us and what we've been through.....I don't want to let him go. I can feel my throat closing, this frustration taking me over. It's not fair. There can't be a me without him, we're two in the same. I circle the piano and move closer to him, any thought of the crowd forgotten. My hand stretches out of it's own accord and traces the line of his jaw. I can't let him go.
//"So long together,
Two would be lovers.
Caring for flowers,
That just wouldn't grow.
We're ending all of our tomorrow's,
We'll have yesterdays.
But wasn't it good?
Wasn't it fine?
While I took for granted,
You took your time.
Longing for love,
Oh how we tried.
It's over now that's understood.
But wasn't it good?"//
He's staring at me, I'm staring back. The crowd is silent behind us. I want him to know how much I'll miss him, how much he means to me. The look in his eyes tells me he knows.
//"I'm gonna miss....I'm gonna miss you baby"//
He plays the final chord and I can't help myself, the tears stream down my face and I pull him up off the stool and into my arms. The crowd roars around us. My hands lock behind his back as I hold him as tight as I possibly can, his arms encircle my waist and I feel his body against mine, his head on my shoulder, his tears trickling onto my skin. After what I wish was an eternity, I let him go and turn him to face the crowd, I raise our entwined hands to the sky and the crowd erupts again.
"Ladies and Gentlemen, please thank, my best friend and partner...Mr Daniel Jones."
The crowds enthusiasm surges forward and hits us like a tidal wave of emtion, girls in the front few rows are crying while others simply stand there, silently applauding. I pull him against me once more, our tears mixing as I put my lips to his ear.
"I love you, Jonesy."
