The walls seemed to overflow with such memories. I stepped into the doorway of his home, turning the key I was given in the lock, and hearing the satisfied click. I was welcomed by the bland....Daniel-ish colours that had haunted me what seemed to be years before. It did not suprise me that this house was quiet, even this late. The digital clock on the kitchen counter angrily flashed 7:37pm.
It seemed to me I would be unwelcome in this home. In his home. After the split, we had become a little distant. I hadn't called and so he hadn't bothered. I never blamed him. Maybe it was more than just the split....Maybe it was my obscure desire to put him in positions he would 'rather not deal with' as he would say it. He knew now though, the bastard knew. Yes, I love him. More than anything, and was more than hesitant to show him that night. But I gave in. I made the sacrifice. A touch, a glance, a kiss....And he pushed it away.

And then life moved on.

At least for him, it seemed. We hadn't talked in months. And I was dying. I walked past the bookshelf, dusting my fingertips across the top, noticing the collection of dust that flared toward the ceiling when I did. The house was a bit of a wreck, clothes and ashtrays and such garbage distributed haphazardly around the living room, and into the narrow hallways of the flat. I stopped in my tracks, and bent over to pick up a red hooded sweatshirt. And i brought it up to my nose, inhaling deeply, smelling the smoky fabric, enhanced with a bit of cologne mist, almost coconut flavoured, and the distinct smell of him. You know, the smell you recognize that sets your mind dizzy and reminds you they're there.....Yes, Danny, it's been a while.

And there he lay, in his bedroom, his tanned golden honey skin sprawled lazily out on the pure white sheets in disarray, chest moving up and down in rhythmic sync. His hair had grown, almost down below his ears. His eyes were closed gently, and his lips slightly parted, slightly chapped, but definitely luscious. He wore white linen pants, tied slightly below his hips, teasing my every sense. The bones of his hips poked out a bit, and there was a thin line of blonde hair that fell in tufts around his navel.....and lower...

The light from late afternoon sifted in through the window breathing lightly over his body, making him glow.
I walked over to the bed, sitting lightly, touching his shoulder, hesitantly. When he didn't wake, I pushed a little harder.
'Hey, Danny......' I whispered, 'Danny, wake up.'
And the angel woke up. His pupils immediately dliated under the light from the window, and he reached up and mussed his hair, before addressing me. And he looked at me, a bit in a dream-like stance, maybe a bit confused.
'Hey, Daz.....what are you doing here??' He said, his voice cracking with sleep.
'Just.....in the neighborhood.....' I lied.
'Daz.......you live in San Fran now...Brisbane isnt a hop, skip and a jump.......'
'I wanted to see you.' Ah.....now that was more honest of me.
He moved gently to get some clothes on, and I watched as the thin lilac sweater was pulled over his head, and stretched across his chest. His hair stuck up a bit after and he ran his hands through it again. We looked at each other, both looking for a way to kill the wall of silence that had bound us for all these months. And I spoke.

'Hey, Jonesy, let's go for a drive, to the beach.'
And without arguing...
'Ok.'
He pulled on some jeans and we left.

Summer was hinting at its disappearance, the temps were cooler,and the beaches nearly deserted. I drove a bit tensely, wondering what was going through that blonde coated head. He chewed on the tip of his sunglasses lazily, his eyes screwed up and gazing deep into heavens, the crystal green shards of his irises glowed with shades of pink and red and orange. I fixed my gaze back on the horizon, and the ocean came into view. The sky slowly melted into a blue nothing, hanging ominously over the sea.
Suddenly I was brought back to reality by the rude bleeping of his cell. He annoyedly pulled it out of his deep pocket, look at it, looked at me, and threw it out the window. He moved to look in the rearview and smiled happily as it exploded into thousands of shards of powertel nonsense on the shining road. And he looked back at myself, whose unbelieving eyes were pasted on the familiar grin of a certain someone whom I was trulymadlydeeply infatuated with.
It seemed to him that nothing else mattered. We had said barely 40 words to each other, and he seemed so.....nonchalant. it frightened me, really.
And I turned my head back to the road, barely dodging a turtle, and heard it for the first time in forever. He laughed, a gentle chuckle, but enough to send ME flying....and I knew then...everything would be okay.
It was 8:25 by then.

Summer was dying, and so was my conscience, as we walked across the dry dark honey coloured sand, footprints sinking delicately into the sand, and I found myself looking back at them as I strolled, observing the way mine and his were placed side by side, in such an almost wordless pact, the way it was MEANT to be. He carried a blanket from my trunk, and I carried a cooler with drinks and some chilled sandwiches. I stopped short about 10 feet from where the waves kissed the shore, where sand met the sparse heat scorched grass, and groped for the blanket, pulling it from his grasp.
"Hey, thanks for coming, I....." I stopped to think, looking into his eyes, and continued, 'I've wanted to see you for quite some time, actually....'and he looked away, searching..
'Well, you found me..'
'Daniel......Look, Daniel. I'm SORRY about that night, okay?! I'm sorry about.....everything.' My voice grew quiet towards the end.....with the depth of my emotions...and I threw a stick into the water, and watched as a wave swallowed it hungrily. I dipped my head back, letting my long semi-blonde hair fall against my shoulders, and breathed gently, looking at the sky, which had died down to a typical night picture. And he sighed in disbelief.
'Don't tell me you put all these thoughts into my head and wanna change your mind now.....' and his eyes seemed tear up a bit. Like a confused child.
"Danny...I......'
'Daz.....to hear you think these feelings are a mistake.....to hear you brush me off......well, now I....now I know what you went through.....but....darren, to hear you think your love for me was a mistake....well, it's the worst insult you could ever give me....' and it broke. The tears slid down his face, and I could feel him. His sadness, his loneliness, his depression......and my arm moved to cradle him, but he moved too fast.
He never even looked at me, he just got up, and looked into the sky, and flung his drink into the water. I watched silently, as he walked to the ocean, let the wave run over his body soaking him to the core. He raised his hands up to God, shut his eyes, and just stood there in the water until his common sense drove him to come back.

Now we were sprawled out, under the velvet darkness, diamond stars sprinkled above us like our dreams. Once again silence built between us...it was beginning to be the topic of conversation for us. Finally, the question came to my lips. The one that had haunted me for the past 5 minutes.
'Why the hell were you standing out in the water like a fool??' I asked, the gentleness in my tone overwriting the harsh words.
'I was praying.' I laughed.
'You?? Daniel JONES praying?! What about, Jonesy??' And I rolled to my side, looking at his face as he gazed upward.
'For me, and what I'm about to say...........' I waited expectantly.
'I think I'd like to be with you forever, Dazza...........I really do.....truly, I do.' And he looked in my eyes, and skimmed over my face searchingly. And he returned my kiss from 7 months ago. Soft, chapped lips against mine, so strangely masculine, so divinely Daniel. And under the glow of the stars, pure and white, and Venus, who was perched in the far distance, he glowed with an ethereal aura of the purest most colourful love I've ever experienced. and it's funny, that even after all that time, he tasted exactly the same as that night.......only.....I tasted something different this time, vague, but I wouldnt doubt that what I tasted now is a divinely angelic need, and a silent want for my companionship, untainted. And it was not denied. Yes, Danny, it's been a while........

When I was a child, I used to wonder that if you climbed high enough into the sky, if you could see your own future...tonight, I wouldn't doubt it. Mine sure was clear. As we clung tightly to each other, I felt him shiver, from the chill air on his wet clothes, no doubt. I wrapped my arm around his trembling body, pulling him closer, I moved us to lie down and pulled the rough blanket over us, pulling his closer, letting my heat seep into his skin. My eyes met his, and we both smiled, and my hand moved to lazily entwine in is sandy locks, twisting them and pulling his head against my neck, preparing to sleep. We could talk later. Tonight was ours. I drifted off to the beat of his heart, and the crashing waves pulling me toward a dreamless sleep snuggled up against the warmth we created. I vaguely remember watching his green eyes creep shut, and him snuggling as close as possible.
'Love you, Dazza.'
'Love you too, Jonesy.'