Under the Moonlight
Midnight Sun

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Midnight Sun by Teresa
 
(Disclaimed: 'Midnight Sun', David Sylvian)
 
The darkness is frightening
And love is denied
They've stolen the moon
God only knows why
 
The first thing he did once I opened the door was grab my shoulders roughly and throw me against him, causing my weak body to reel from the force. With a muffled gasp, he cradles me with his lean, wiry arms. He never said a word, but he didn't need to. I have fantasized and obsessed over feeling his body, burning and protective, against my own, for long enough to be able to recognize it anywhere. Wrapping my arms around his shoulders, I clutch the fine cloth of his shirt with my hands and involuntarily, my hips jerk forward against his thighs.

However, before I could completely relinquish myself to the pleasure, he pulls away suddenly, the cold emptiness enveloping me once again.

"You've lost weight," he exclaims with horror. "....You're even thinner now then you were after you woke up from the coma!"

"Well...it hasn't been easy - adjusting."

"Why didn't you tell me? Damnit, Darren, do you know how I learned that you were even here? I had to find out from the 6 o'clock news that you were back in Brisbane! Were you even going to tell me you came back?" His voice is tinged with anger, making me flinch.

I lower my head so he couldn't see the horrible, ironic tears in my eyes. "I'm sorry...god, it's just that...ever since the accident, I've just been a burden to everyone---being in everyone's way like a helpless newborn baby that's been abandoned in front of a doorstep. I didn't want to tell you---I mean, I thought you would do so much better by yourself if you didn't know, than with me there, hindering you."

"Darren, why are you saying this? I'm your best friend! I was the one who stayed by your bedside, never leaving you for all those days when no one had any hope of you waking up, I was the one who stayed after even your family had deserted you---I was the one that night who---" He stops suddenly, his voice surprising me, tight, simmering with hurt, grief---and guilt?

Guilt? Well, after all, he was the one driving the car that night of the accident. The next day was to be the last day of the tour, and Daniel was ecstatic. It was also his anniversary---he was going to propose to Michelle. I, of course, feigned as best as I possibly could and said I was overjoyed for him. We were passing an intersection when we were slammed sideways; he escaped relatively unharmed. On the other hand, I suffered a concussion, and the microscopic, crystalline shards of glass embedded themselves so deeply into my eyeballs that it made me permanently blind.

"Daniel, I don't want you to blame yourself for what happened---that crash wasn't your fault---it was the other driver who was drunk and ran the red light...and it hasn't really been that bad. Everything has changed so much, and so quickly in the past few months---it just takes a while to digest. But...I'm still alive, right? Being blind isn't the end of the world---what's that old cliché? 'What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger...' I'm feeling a lot better lately---and you're here now! So everything is back to normal!" And it was true. Almost. But I just couldn't bear hearing Daniel so agonized, almost as if my own suffering was contagious.

"Are you trying to make me feel better by saying you're happy? I know you a lot better than you think---and I don't believe for a second that you mean it. I care about you, Darren." My heart twinges. "I look at you, I listen to you, and I can't believe it's you I'm seeing, you who is saying the words actually coming out of your mouth. I've never known you to act like this. Darren, tell me what's really going on."

"I...no, Daniel---it's been so long---and you already know what's happened to me. I want to know...tell me...how are you? Have you married Michelle yet?"

I can feel him standing close to me, his breath caressing my skin, making it tingle, his aura teasing me, penetrating through the outermost layers of my black void. I feel his eyes on me, and I remember how they used to look, the tranquil emeralds that haunted my dreams for a thousand nights.

"I...uhh, we're not together anymore---we broke up...." comes his response, sounding almost as if he had forgotten. Like he didn't care, like he forgot about the relationship he had with her for so many years.

"What? What happened? You two were so happy together---" I try to mask the hopeful tone of my voice.

"It happened while you were in the hospital. After you fell into the coma, I realized that---umm....we just had a falling apart. We weren't making each other happy. It's okay now, though," and he leaves it at that.

"Ohh...I'm so sorry...." I feel him backing away, his footsteps reverberating like echoes through the floorboard and up my bones.

"Daniel??" My arms blindly shoot out ahead of me, desperately seeking his warmth.

"Oh, God, Darren! I'm sorry, I forgot...I'm right here, standing in front of you love," he rushes forward and gathers me against his chest, then, like he just realized what he did, suddenly backs away again. I can't take it anymore---I try to imagine how he would look, with his golden skin and his long, lithe limbs that Adonis himself would envy. I try to imagine how he would feel again, and instead all I can sense is his body maddeningly close, untouchable to me.

"Daniel, I can't...I feel like we're so distant from each other---I can't see you---I want to see you---would you mind if I touch you? So I can see you with my hands?" I blurt out before I even realize it, before I explode from the need to feel him, before I explode from cold, dead vacuum engulfing me.

Pause. "...Yes, of course. I mean, please touch me. I mean, it's okay if you touch me...."

"Are you sure? You don't mind?" I extend my hands in front of me until I sense his face close, underneath my palms.

"Please---go ahead...." He whispers, his voice barely audible.


Sucking in my breath, I slowly bring my hands to his hair, and I run my fingers through their softness, stopping until my fingers are cradling the back of his head and my thumbs are caressing his earlobes. I tug lightly on his earrings and feel the stubs prick my finger. Moving downward, I wrap my hands lightly around his long neck and trail my fingers upwards, feeling his strong jaw and stroking his soft, full lips with my index finger. I rest my palms against his hot cheeks, and push the short strands of hair out of his forehead.

Trailing my fingertips downwards, I stop when I feel his strong shoulders underneath my hands. I encircle them with my hands and smooth them down his long arms. I feel the small round buttons of his shirt over his flat stomach and gently stroke the muscles on his chest, allowing myself to imagine how they would feel uncovered, sweaty, and forcing themselves down upon my body.

I don't even realize it at first when I slip my hands underneath his collar to feel his bare flesh underneath. The touch of my hands on his burning skin sends currents of electricity up my arms and I fondle the hard flesh. The top buttons of his shirt come undone, I bring my hands down, over his pectorals, and I rub and stroke his nipples. I undo the rest of the buttons and slide it off his shoulders. It isn't until this point that I realize just how hard his muscles seem to be. No, not hard...tense. Tense? Oh lord...what have I done? What could he be thinking now?

"I'm sorry...I'm so sorry," my hands come flying off his chest, almost as if the flesh has scalded me. I jump backwards, the words choking in my throat as they stumble out.

All the pain comes rushing up through me at once, causing me to reel. I turn around and stumble towards the door leading into the hallway, tripping on a chair along the way. Daniel is there in an instant, catching me before I fall.

"No, Darren...don't apologize. I want it---I want you to feel me---" He grasps my slender waist with both hands and turns me around, taking one of my hands. "Do you feel me?" He places my hand on his groin, and moves it downward, so I feel the throbbing flesh and tight, rough jeans over his hardness.

Wordlessly, I drop down to my knees. I can't believe it---Daniel? With my index finger, I trace down the zipper over his erection, pausing in wonder on the nub.

"Darren!!" He gasps above me, his hips jerking forward until his crotch hits me in my face. I giggle---and my laughing, cheerful voice sounds strange, foreign to me.

"Is this how you want to play?" I tease, unhooking the belt and undoing the fly slowly. I slide the rough material down his hips and peel it off, along with his shoes, in one move. I press my face against his boxers, inhaling his scent deeply, imagining how it would look right now---hugging his rear, outlining his curves and straining around the crotch. Gently, I nip at the tip of his erection, and he groans with pleasure and frustration. I push off the underwear, and slowly lick up the length of his hard flesh with my tongue before completely swallowing it.

He moans my name, and his voice is dripping with lust once I do this, grabbing my head and pushing it even more into him as his hips thrust forward. My tongue explores his length and I suckle him slowly, until he starts ramming himself into my mouth repeatedly.

"DAARRENN!!!" He screams, and I taste his hot cream spurt out. I drink it all up, licking off every last drop as if it were my mother's own milk.

He rams into my mouth one last time, then collapses over me, and I am now the one holding him, cradling him, my precious baby. He is quaking in the aftermath, and I hear his breath coming out in ragged gasps.

"Darren...ohh God...I've never felt anything like that before in my life---" He manages between gasps, "I want you to feel it---"

"The bedroom is across the hall," we get up and lead each other to the bed, him taking my hand and guiding me across the room, and me supporting him as he climbs unsteadily onto his feet.

Once we reach the bed, he lays me down upon the crisp linen sheets and kisses me passionately, feeding me his tongue. My arms reach behind his neck and around his shoulders, for support. He strips off my clothes and his hands roam down my narrow frame, stroking my flesh gently. He follows down this path with his mouth, eating my flesh, making it burn with an indescribable desire and need. He pauses for a moment, pinning me down against the bed and separating his body from mine.

"Daniel?"

"I want to look at you---you look so delicate," he takes a lock of my hair and twists it around his finger. "I see you haven't gotten a haircut since the accident, either."

"Well, what's the use? I mean, I can't see how I look anymore, so why bother?" I grin, touching his face with my fingers so I can feel him smiling also. "What do you think?"

"I like it---I've always preferred your hair longer---that way, I now can comb it, braid it, and put it into pigtails---though I don't even remember the last time I've seen your natural hair color."

"Oh yea? Well, if you want you can dye it back---but I'm afraid you're going to do it hot pink or something and not tell me."

"Ohh...think you're funny, huh? What do you think about this?" All of a sudden, I feel the sensation of two fingers sliding into me, caressing my inner flesh, and rubbing me lightly.

"Ohhh...Daniel...please---" I writhe, grinding my hips against his hand.

"God, Darren, I want to so badly---if it were up to me I would be pounding into you right now, but I don't want to hurt you...you don't have any lubricant?"

I am so overcome with the aching carnality that it takes up all my breath in responding. "No, Daniel, I want it---everything, all the pain along with the pleasure that relinquishing myself to you would take. I've wanted this for so long...I want to experience you all inside me, pure, complete---I want to learn everything about your body, how you feel inside me, as if I can see it with my own eyes. Please, I'm begging you---what do they say in those romance novels? 'Make me yours'---make me your whore, Daniel."

"Darren...." He pants deeply, his voice sounding like he was in tears. With a low moan, he covers my mouth with his hot, moist lips and our tongues battle our way into each other's mouths. Spreading my legs apart, he lifts them up to his shoulders and I feel his tip contact and rest against my cleft. "Are you sure?"

Wailing in the yen, I grasp his muscular forearms roughly and drive my hips down against his hard erection until I feel the beginnings of my inner skin splitting in pain. I scream loudly, and he cups my face with his hands lovingly and smoothes the long strands of hair out of my face.

"Okay...here we go now---" Slowly, he penetrates me deeper, millimeter by millimeter, tenderly and gently, almost as if I am a porcelain doll, one that is with large, expressionless glass eyes. Tenderly, he takes my own arousal into his hands, and tugs and rubs it, in tune with his own movements.

The pleasure is unbelievable---every nerve ending in my body erupting with desirewhen had I ever felt anything like this? Did the loss of my sight refine my other senses, making me feel more than I have ever experienced before? I show my appreciation; I moan loudly---deep and foreign, coming from deep within my throat.

Daniel moans also, delving deep within me, moving in wide circles, tearing me apart. A murmur escapes from his lips and suddenly, he pulls himself all the way out of me.

"Daniel?!" I cry, pressing my feverish hands against his sweaty chest. But all I hear in response is another deep moan, and all of a sudden, he thrusts all of himself back inside in one quick move. He feels like a jackhammer when he mercilessly starts pounding into me, the pain causing me to dig my nails deeply into the flesh of his chest. However, the pain is nothing in comparison with the pleasure that is overwhelming me, drowning me. My semen pours out of me the same time he climaxes, mine flowing over his hands and dripping back onto my stomach, his swimming inside me, around him.

With a grunt, he collapses over me, his chest burying mine as we gasp, trying to catch our breaths. With a shaking hand, he caresses my face, softly kissing me on my mouth and neck. He clutches my face with both hands, resting his forehead against mine.

"You're so beautiful," he whispers into my face.

"Daniel, is it possible to feel like this?"

"Yes...forever, ---shhh...rest now, go to sleep, love," he cradles me into his arms, and I press my face against his chest, our legs tangling together. I close my eyes and let myself bathe in his glorious sun, his sun that escaped the daytime sky and ran away to the depths of my black night, shining his sublime light through the layers of empty nothingness. Who would have thought that there was anything worth seeing in the dark? I open my eyes again and marvel at the world he lights around me for the first time, with more opportunities, life, and love, with him, my beautiful midnight sun.




~finis~
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