It's All Coming Back to Me Now by Stina

(Disclaimed: 'It's All Coming Back to Me Now', Céline Dion)

Prologue:

"I finished crying in the instant that you left

And I can't remember where or when or how

And I banished every memory

You and I had ever made

But when you touch me like this

And you hold me like that

I just have to admit

That it's all coming back to me now...

There were nights of endless pleasure

It was more than any laws allow...."

"Well, Darren said he had to close the door to open another, you know..."

Daniel stood in the kitchen, looking absent-minded out of the window while cleaning a few dishes in the sink. The voice he heard on the radio was his own, again and again they played parts of the interview.

It was over. Finally it was over. And he did not know if he was happy now or sad. He felt empty inside. It should have been a relief, but obviously it was not. He told himself that the split had been necessary for their future. For what should they keep the image alive that they were still a band, still were partners. They had not seen each other since... He could not remember. Months. They had grown apart, in every meaning of the word. They had stopped being partners in music and in business long ago. And they had stopped being partners in life even longer ago. Partners. How... Functional this sounded. They had been so much more.

Daniel bit his lower lip. Maybe it had been a bit too bitter what he had said, but after what Darren had said...

And as if the DJ had heard him, he now announced Darren's view on the subject.

"...and you know, I love Daniel like a brother and he is...

...a fucking son of a bitch."

Daniel froze. No. He had heard the interview before and Darren did not say....

Slowly he turned around.

Darren stood next to the radio, arms crossed, his face an inscrutable mask.

Daniel gasped. "God, Darren... What..."

'Oh my God, how beautiful he is..' was his first, silly thought. The blond hair. The slightly unshaven face. Not only on pictures anymore, but in reality in front of him.

Just a moment. What was he doing here. In his house. And what had he just said? What did he call him? His eyes narrowed.

"How did you get inside? And WHAT did you say?"

Expressionlessly Darren held up a key in his hand. "Still got your key. Remember? You never asked me to give it back. Should change your lock. And I called you a fucking son of a bitch."

Daniel felt the anger rise inside. Oh well, back to old routine. They were arguing every time they saw each other. The knuckles of his fingers still holding the dish turned white.

"That's not a nice thing to say about my mother."

Darren smirked. "Oh, yes, sorry. Okay, you fucking asshole."

Daniel tried to stay calm. He really tried. "If you are looking for an asshole here, why don't you just go to the bathroom and look into the mirror? You surely still know the way."

Darren gave a dry laugh.

"Darren said he had to close the door." He quoted Daniel. "You want to blame ME? You closed the door. YOU closed the door two years ago when you..." His voice turned louder. He did not notice it.

"...Excuse me? What did you say? ME? YOU wanted to do the new album so fast. I said, let's wait another year. But you..."

"Ah, thank you, Sir. We would still sit here patiently if we had waited for Mr. 'Oh-no-interviews-I'm-so-shy' to come into the studio..."

"And would this be a problem? Hm? Would this be a problem, well, if we had waited, maybe now we would have started recording instead of two years ago!!!! Happy and relaxed and still friends, still..." Daniel smashed the dish back into the water, splattering foam everywhere.

"Oh SURE!!!" Darren was yelling now. He made a step forward. "SURE! I have had ENOUGH of this. ENOUGH!!!!" He grabbed an already cleaned, dry dish and threw it to the ground. "It's OVER, Dan, but don't you blame me!!! Don't you dare to blame me!!!"

Daniel's face flushed. He took the wet flannel, threw it in Darren's direction. "And don't YOU dare to smash MY things!" He screamed. "Get out of here or.... Or...!!!!"

"Or what?!" shouted Darren back. "Or WHAT? And what did you say, YOUR things? May I remember that you bought all of this because of our success, based in the first place on MY lyrics, and MY voice? Anyone could write your SAPPY melodies!!!!!!!"

He took a large bowl, containing the remains of Daniel's dinner, a few spaghetti and a lot of tomato sauce. Without thinking he hurled it forward, missing Daniel's head only a few centimetres. It shattered on the kitchen board, spaghetti and sauce splashing all around the room.

Daniel looked at the mess with his mouth open. He took a deep breath, clenched his fists.

"GET OUTTA HERE! NOW! I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN IN MY WHOLE LIFE!!!"

He lowered his voice to a dangerous whisper. "It was a mistake from the beginning. To take you when I held the audition for a new singer for my band. I should have taken this guy from Sydney." He laughed humourless.

"Know what? I think I'll hold a new audition. I'll get a new singer and songwriter and go on with the band. Who needs YOU. There are millions of guys out there who could do it. Write songs... Better than you did." He smiled maliciously, took a deep breath. "And surely they are better in bed than..."

He did not even see Darren's flat hand coming. Just saw his face turn to an angry grimace.

SMACK!

Eyes wide open he stared at Darren, raised his fingers cautiously to his burning cheek, feeling the swollen skin where the shape of Darren's hand was to be seen in red, slowly turning a deeper shade.

"You..." His voice was barely audible. "You... Never... Hit me... Never... In all the years we were together... Never..."

Darren was panting. His lips were shivering.

"I'm sorry, Danny.... I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.... I did not mean to... Oh God, Danny, I'm sorry...."

He came closer, shaking his head all the time. "Please... Forgive me, please..."

He saw Daniel raise his hand and closed his eyes, pressing his eyelids tightly together.

He waited.

Nothing happened.

He opened his eyes again.

Daniel was standing so close he could now feel his breath on his face. His eyes were swimming with tears.

"What has happened to us, Darren... What have we done..."

It happened as if someone else directed his moves. Darren's hands grabbed Daniel's face, pulling him close. Crushing his lips in a fierce kiss. He felt Daniel's hands on his chest, trying to push him away. Felt his hands grab his shirt now, fisting the fabric. Roaming his body, digging the nails in his back. They stumbled backwards, losing their balance on the slippery ground.

They tumbled over, trying to get a hold of the sink, they fell, Daniel on top of Darren.

A sharp sound when Daniel ripped Darren's shirt, tearing it apart. They kissed again, madly, deeply.

Darren's hands moving under Daniel's shirt, pulling it over his head. Touching, groping, kissing.

Daniel tried to push the remains of the bowl aside so that they did not cut themselves. They had tomato sauce smeared all over now, hands, hair, bodies.

Whispered confessions, held back way too long.

"Still love you... Always loved you..."

"Oh God, Danny... Missed you so... Never stopped loving you..."

Trembling hands opening pants, pushing them down impatiently. Nails scratching over naked skin. Deep moans.

Darren rubbed Daniel's cheek, mixing the red of the traces of his slap with the orange- red of the tomatoes.

"I'm so sorry... I don't know why I did this..."

He pushed his hard cock against Daniel's naked body.

Daniel groaned with lust. "Okay, maybe I provoked you... But when were together, we also argued...You NEVER hit me..."

He grabbed Darren's buttocks, pinched them hard, making Darren scream out.

"You don't know where your borders are anymore, that's the problem..."

He pulled Darren's hair, forcing him into another kiss.

"You always knew them when we were together, remember?"

They rolled over the floor, kissing, biting, clinging.

Intentionally Daniel scratched Darren's back hard. "You are spoiled and arrogant as ever... Did ANYONE show you in the last two years where your borders are? Anyone?"

Darren reached down, pushing Daniel's legs apart to rub his cock tighter with his body.

He shoved his tongue between Daniel's lips, pinched his nipples with sticky fingers.

"No... No one..." He gasped. "No one stopped me... I got everything I wanted... No one complained... I was the star..."

Daniel pulled his hair hard and painful. "That's not a good thing, Darren... Not at all..."

Darren stared at him, biting his own lip. "No, it is not... Oh God, Danny..."

"Give me something..."

"What do you want..."

"You know it..."

Darren tried to get up, grabbed the edge of the kitchen table, looked around. He grabbed something, bumping back to the floor.

Wordlessly he handed Daniel a large wooden kitchen spoon.

His body was shaking when he positioned himself on knees and hands like so many times before when it had been necessary.

He closed his eyes. Oh, how he had missed Daniel's kisses, his touch, his love. But he had also missed this.

He moaned loudly when the spoon hit his naked buttocks the first time with a loud smack.

He hardly had time to breathe until the next blow came.

"Yes..." He whispered.

The blows pelt down merciless on his butt, hard and painful, making him groan in pain and pleasure. He felt Daniel's hand on the back of his neck, pushing him flat to the floor.

A few more hard smacks.

He heard how Daniel threw the wooden spoon away, felt him push his legs wide apart, felt his weight on his back.

Long, slim fingers, coated with sweat and tomato sauce pushed between his buttocks, probed his opening, pushed deep inside. Darren whimpered, need and lust clearly audible.

"Thank you..."

A rough tongue licked his back.

"Darren, you taste even more delicious than ever..." purred a voice close to his ear.

Every breath Darren let out was a soft, pleading moan now.

"Take me, Danny... Oh, take me...."

He felt the fingers slip from his body, grabbing his hips. A slick, hard cock pressed against his opening, gliding slowly inside, stretching him with a lot of pleasure and a bit of pain.

Darren threw back his head in ecstasy. "Daniel......Oh, God..."

Just like this he loved it. Exactly like this.

He held his breath when Daniel began to push in, drew back, pushed in even deeper.

"Aaaahhh.... Yessss....."

He pressed his forehead to the cold kitchen floor, noticing for the first time in his life that tomato sauce burned when it got into one's eyes. He did not care.

"Fuck me, Daniel... Fuck me harder...."

Daniel was pounding him now, biting his shoulder hard.

"Darren... Oh Darren... You still drive me crazy... You..."

He was breathing faster, bringing one hand around Darren's body, grabbing his hard cock, jerking him off in rhythm to his own strokes.

"Aaahh... Aaaahhh..."

He was close. Not only close to coming, but also close to collapsing. Little white stars were appearing before his eyes, transforming to shooting stars, multiplying with every deep push into Darren's body.

"Come, Darren... Come...."

They were both panting, groaning, screaming.

"Danny, I...I..."

"Yes... Oh, now... Now!!! Yes... Aahh... Aaahhhh!!!!"

Frantic deep shoves. Nails and teeth digging so deep into Darren's back that he screamed like a wounded animal, releasing his lust into Daniel's hand. Pants, sounding like cries, bodies collapsing on the floor.

Silence.

Irregular breathing, slowing down.

They were both lying on their backs now, staring at the ceiling.

Silence.

A soft chuckle from Darren, turning to a contented laugh.

"Oh God, Daniel, you won't believe how badly I missed this...."

Daniel turned his head slowly, smiling at Darren.

"Me too, Daz. Me too."

Lazily they turned towards each other, hugging, drawing each other close into a deep embrace.

A soft, tender kiss.

Darren sighed. "Just in case I did not make it quite clear- Daniel, I still love you. And I fear I will love you all my life until I die."

Daniel caressed his tomato stained face with sticky fingers. "I love you, too, Darren. And I always will."

Another sigh.

"And now?"

"You mean..."

Daniel tried to smooth Darren's messy hair. "Yeah... Call the journalists... Tell them, we're back together... Oh, Mr. Adams, good news... Darren came back, and, by the way, he's still an ANIMAL in bed..."

They giggled.

"No, Dan. It would start all over. Recording, promoting, touring, recording.... It would break you again. I love you too much for doing this to you."

He kissed Daniel's lips, licking them.

"Mmmm... I LOVE tomato on you... Danny, we achieved everything. We don't have to prove something to us."

His tongue licked Daniel's face, moving over to his ear.

"Let's leave it the way it is now. But... What do you think about... One week a month... You in San Francisco... One week... Me in Brisbane...."

"Mmmmm.... Sounds good..."

"Honestly, Danny?"

"Honestly, Daz..."

More tender kisses.

"Danny..."

"Hmm?"

"You said I am still an animal in bed..?"

"Ah, shut up, Hayes... Okay, yes..."

"You can't know... We haven't been in your bed yet...."

"Ah, yes... Do you think we should...?

"Mmmm.... Yes..."

"Darren... Maybe a little side-trip to the shower, yes? I don't think tomato sauce matches with my white satin sheets..."

"Mmmm... YOU have white satin sheets? For whom, hm?"

"DARRENNN..."

"Okay, okay..."

"Then come on, let's get up...."

"Danny..."

"Hm?"

Blushing slightly, Darren took Daniel's hand, led it down to his body.

Daniel grinned, raised an eyebrow.

"Woah, Dazza..."

He pulled him close.

"Okay... Shower has to wait... Five minutes..."

Darren threw back his head.

"Aaahhh... I think... Two minutes... Will do it..."

He gasped when he felt Daniel sliding down his body slowly, moving his lips over his skin.

"Aaah.. Okay... As soon as you... Aahhh......"

He pressed Daniel's head softly to his groin.

Daniel looked up grinning, licked his lips.

"But THIS matches perfectly with the tomato flavour..."

Darren sighed. "Mmm.... Now the shower..?"

Daniel kissed his thigh. "Afraid not..."

"Not?"

"Come on... Turn over again... "

"Oh DANNY...."

Epilogue:

"There were those empty threats and hollow lies

And whenever you tried to hurt me

I just hurt you even worse

And so much deeper

But if you forgive me all this

If I forgive you all that

We forgive and forget

And it's all coming back to me

When you kiss me like this

And when I touch you like that

And if you do it like this

And if we... "