Fool by Savage Enchantress Aurelia

Sit upon your throne of pearl
Deceptively innocent, unknowingly cruel


I can barely hear myself think over the roar of the crowd, but I love it. This is what I live for. The rush, the adrenaline, the knowledge that I'm affecting so many people. Nothing is more glorious than this.


As I look to the other side of the stage, I can see you watching me. So quiet and innocent in public, so soft spoken. What a clever facade.


The seduction starts, my thoughts whirl
You think I am a fool?


You're staring at me with those eyes of yours, giving me a come-hither look. But no...I shouldn't. I can't let you control me right now. I'm free of everything when I'm on stage. Free of you.


A gaze too long, no words spoken
All so wrong, the spell's unbroken


Oh, God, please, turn away. The intensity of this gaze is unbearable. I can feel it like fire as I turn my back, attempting to give my full attention to the hoards of fans in the audience. You're burning me, reducing my will to ashes...


Don't make me say yes, nor make me give in
Don't enchant me with those eyes of sin


I can't stay on one side of the stage for the whole song, so I have to face you. Your eyes capture mine again as I do just that, and your tongue darts out to wet your bottom lip. Oh, you don't play fair. Don't do this to me, not now, not again. Let me have control, just once. You're cocking your head to one side now, regarding me with smoldering desire. Someone tell me my face isn't turning red...


I'm yours to have, I'm yours to break
My soul is yours to forsake


We're in the dressing room now, and my back's against the wall. You're grinding your hips into mine in a terribly erotic fashion, your hands groping me with enough strength to leave a bruise. And even though a small part of me is saying that this is wrong, I know that it's what I want.


Hurt me, make me scream your name
To you, all this is just a game


You bite down on my lip, and I groan, whimpering slightly at the pain. My hands are forced above my head, crossed at the wrists, where you're holding them down firmly. The fingers of your other hand fumble with my leather pants, followed by your own.


And then you're inside me, and both my body and my conscience are screaming.


Never let the pain abate
Torture me in your art of hate


I often find myself wondering how I can take pleasure in this, how I can overlook the pain that you cause me each time you thrust into me, pain that is both physical and emotional. After each encounter, my pale skin is marred with bruises that my soul has seen as well. But I always come back for more.


Have me beg, have me plead
Force me to see my need


You're whispering to me in that low voice of yours now, demanding submission. You know that you'll get it. I find shame in begging you, but I need release, and I know that you're the only one that can give it to me. I know why, as well, but I can't bring myself to think of it, to acknowledge my naivete. And so the words tumble from my lips, giving you the power you crave, asking for little in return.


Make the tears fall from my eyes
Betray my trust with velvet lies


You come, grunting as your essence flows into me. I follow you quickly over the edge, peaceful for one fleeting moment as I float higher than any cloud in the heavens.


But then I fall from grace, my eyes opening to see you staring at me, an expression on your face that I've seen many times. Have you something to say to me? Any words at all for one who just connected with you in the most intimate way?


In your eyes, I can see it. You want to say something, I know that you must. But soon the cold mask that I have grown used to settles over your face again, and your eyes leave mine. You say nothing as you pick up your discarded jeans and pull them on. I'm left against the wall, again, and it is only when I hear the door close behind you that I start to cry.


Make me laugh with bitter mirth
Leave no chance for my rebirth


Laughter, bordering on the edge of hysteria, erupts from me. It mixes with my tears, leaving my emotions in a tangled web of confusion. How can I let you get away with so much, when I know that you'll only leave me in the end?


The answer is funny, really. I know that I can never make this stop, because I need this. I need you.


And you know why?


Because I love you...


So sit upon your throne of pearl
Deceptively innocent, unknowingly cruel
The seduction starts, my thoughts whirl
Play me as your fool